Allen found room 203 with no problem. The door was closed, he paused before opening it and walking in. He caught Sandra’s eyes and braced knowing she was not going to be , unsure of what to expect.
“What’re you doing here?” He expected that. Walking toward her he pleaded with his eyes.
“How you’re doing?”
“Great...no thanks to you.” So many things he wanted to say to her, but probably best not to. He sat down in the chair across from her and looked around the room instead. On the whiteboard on the wall in front of the bed someone had written: RN - Jessica and underneath her name LPN - Denise. It was a small room, but thankfully it was private. The IV dripped above her head, the machine methodical. He broke the silence.
“Nice arrangement.” He looked in the direction of the bouquet of pink Gerber daisy’s by the window. After a once over of the room he noticed it was the only arrangement. He wished then he had brought some flowers. “Is it from the neighbors?” When he looked back she was staring at him. He had forgotten how beautiful she was. Her soft smell intoxicated him bringing him back to a time long before this.
“Don’t worry, you did your good deed for the day. You can leave now.” Just like that the softness he had seen before hardened.
“Can’t you see how much I still care for you? And Megan, she just wants her mom back. We all do.” Sandra turned away and looked out the window. Allen watched her as her eyes glazed over and went dark. There was something she didn’t want to reveal. It was the chasm that neither had been able to cross. “Speaking of Megan where is she?” Allen watched Sandra fade away; he leaned in and touched her hand to bring her back. “Sandra?”
“What?” He had startled her, but the anger from was apparent in her tone.
“Where’s Meagan? I can’t get a hold of her.” He watched her eyes cast downward as she collected her thoughts.
“I don’t know...I think I kicked her out.”
“You think?”
“Give me a break, it’s all foggy.” The tears started falling now. “You blame me for everything.”
“Don’t turn this around on me. You left before I ever did. You gave up and we were left to pick up the pieces.”
“I didn’t give up. My life was taken from me.” she clenched the tissues in her hands, clearly annoyed.
“No.” His voice was softer. “Cindy died, but you still have a chance.” Sandra remained silent. She spoke her next words slowly enunciating the syllables as if each one held its own meaning and weight.
“You don’t understand.” He knew they were getting close to a point of no return. Yet he still wanted to push her, he needed her to see.
“Help me understand.”
“Believe me you don’t want to.” Her chilly demeanor suggested that she was about to cause a scene.
“Fine. Let’s drop it for now.”
“You don’t want to understand.” Allen ignored her. She was picking a fight now.
“I’ll come back later.” He added, “get better Sandra.” With that Allen picked up his jacket placing it over his arm and walked out of the room.
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